Friday Night Flop with Trojan

Now I understand that I have been out of the dating game for sometime and I also know that with our 9 year age difference, the dating game might have different rules…

Last Friday night, Trojan texts asking if I want to go grab dinner and some drinks. I put on a cute dress, some make up and do my hair before I meet up with him at his place. When I arrive, he tells me we have to go to the store so he can buy something to wear. Mind you we are heading to a local sports bar for a burger and some beers…this isn’t fancy shit. You can literally roll in with jeans, a fucking shirt and flip flops. 

We head to Bealls where he picks 4 of the same fucking shirt. No joke, a baby blue Columbia shirt in 4 different textures but all the same color. Why the different textures? Does he have sensory issues? Nope. It is due to his profusely sweaty armpits and needs one that won’t show his wet stank. He tells me this…before dinner…

After picking out a shirt he proceeds to the cashier and loads a coupon on his phone. The cashier explains to him that he can’t use the coupon for the shirt he is buying. He then questions why the shirts are so expensive and when will they be having a sale. I can’t help but wonder if the sale is within the next few days will we have to postpone our fancy dinner plans?  This is when I really start questioning my choices and laughing – literally laughing out loud in the store.

We get to the restaurant and find two seats at the bar. As soon as I sit down, Trojan walks away as he sees someone he knows. He doesn’t say a word to me and just leaves to visit his friends. Obviously this night is going to lead to some good stories, so I might as well start taking some mental notes.

As I sit down, I order a beer and a completely inebriated man sits down next to me. I smile at him and explain that I am with someone as I point towards Trojan. Mr. Drunk Ass laughs loudly and says, “Are you serious? You came here with HIM? You know you don’t have to go home with him right?” Just as he is laughing at his own questions, Trojan comes back and says to Mr. Drunk Ass, “It is cool man, we aren’t a couple. Go ahead and buy her a beer.” Well shit, I might as well let this asshat buy my beer. Trojan and I order dinner and he is sure to let the waiter know that we will be on separate checks. I sure hope this fucker has a coupon for his dinner. 

At some point during the super romantic dinner that I have purchased myself at the local sports bar, I get hit in the arm with a coaster from clear across the bar. Earlier I had noticed 3 guys sitting across the bar enjoying drinks and conversation. Now these 3 guys are avoiding any eye contact and looking guilty as hell. I chuckle and tell Trojan that I am going to go see which one of them “lost” their coaster. I stroll to the other side of the bar and inform the guys that if they wanted to buy me a drink, they could have just had one sent over. They laugh and explain that they were aiming at an empty beer pitcher…sure, sure… They offer to buy me a drink IF I do a shot with them. Who am I to turn down a shot? I enjoy an Orange Fizz shot (their choice) and take my beer thanking the guys as I head back to Trojan. We get our checks and Trojan decides that we will head to another local bar for some more drinks. 

Of course I am going to continue with the night…

Thanks for reading! Come back soon for the final Trojan story as it is sure to not disappoint…or will it? 

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